Since I was supposed to give a concert at 11am, I got up and started getting dressed. I then realized around 11:02am that I needed to get some supplies, so I looked around at my audience of 11 people in my living room and headed out briefly.

By the time I got home, however, it was too late… everyone had left my concert and I felt really guilty. I went out to find the students and to apologize to those who came to see me play, but they were all hanging out with Rudy and they were listening to him talking over me. I tried to yell to get their attention, but later gave up.

I left the school (it was now night) and there was a crowd of people outside. I walked through the crowd, but when I turned back they were all gone. I deducted that they had walked over to the bus terminal to catch their buses home.

That’s when I saw a statue of a Greek Sisyphus-like icon who had a chain and giant 7-foot boulder attached to the back of his left ankle by a mysterious golden metal gadget.. Curious, I read the booklet that accompanied the statue and then tried to pick up the golden metal gadget that had been embedded in stone (the-sword-in-the-stone style). I was able to pick the gadget right up, it worked… I was obviously the chosen one.

I went to see what the gadget would look like were it attached to the back of my left ankle and it suddenly latched onto me with metal teeth digging in. I fell down to the ground in pain, regained my bearings and limped my way home.

After telling my parents what happened, my father started helping by casting a spell to release me. He wrote the ancient story of the Sisyphus-like Greed icon down (saying it aloud had no effect) and then he took out a knife to cut the gadget out of my ankle (at this point, the gadget was already inside my ankle consumed with new skin growth).

As he and my sister carefully cut the mysterious gadget out of my ankle, I tried to think of the famous British comedians who inspire me. Once the procedure was over, my father handed me the gadget, which had now become an HD DVD tape covered in blood.

I lay on the ground perplexed. Then, Ben Elton came up to me on the floor to hug me and tell that I was a very brave little internet celebrity. I wanted to tell him how much I loved his work, especially the Young Ones, but I was then taken away by some nurses to dress the wounds of my operation.

Bekah Havens and some other people that looked familiar brought me to a public park and proceeded to close my wound with a sticker-like cast material. It was then that I was also given crutches to help me get around.

The next thing I remembered I was at a Tiki Bar TV shoot in Vancouver on top of a large brick wall next to a swimming pool. Jeff was trying to film me dancing Tiki-style on the wall, but since I was injured I kept dancing awkward and offbeat. After a minute of dancing, I jumped into the pool and started swimming around in the nude. A lot of other people in the pool were also naked.

As I usually do when in the water (as a synchronized swimmer), I did upside down splits and realized that I shouldn’t since I’m naked. Then, I saw another girl doing it and didn’t feel so weird.