Video Games
Dear n00bs,
I used to be like you once; curious of all the great video games out there, yet scared of the multitude of buttons on modern controllers. But I have a secret for you: modern video games are designed to teach you those buttons throughout the game.
When I was a kid I played a lot of Atari 2600, Nintendo NES and Game Boy. When paying Atari, I had my right hand on the joystick and my left thumb on the orange button. When playing Nintendo, I had my left thumb controlling the d-pad and used my right index and middle fingers to control the A and B buttons. But when video game consoles introduced controllers with 4 buttons, I lost my way and failed to adapt.
Now XBox 360 and PS3 controllers have SO MANY buttons! And, while I’m telling my friends about all the awesome video games I’ve been playing this year (mainly Portal 2 and L.A. Noire), I’ve come across so many people who are afraid of those buttons. The thing I’ve realized, though, is that those games are all designed to teach n00bs like you!
Let’s take the first Portal for example. From the very beginning, the disembodied robotic voice of GLaDOS instructs you. You start working out puzzles in test chambers under her instruction and in every level you learn a new trick. Once the game finally gets complicated, you’ve learned all the rules and have the tools necessary to figure out the rest of the puzzles. Portal 2 is similar… the beginning teaches you basic movement, then basic controls and skills.
In Red Dead Redemption and L.A. Noire the early stages of the game are spent also teaching you basic skills. In Red Dead Redemption, Bonnie MacFarlane teaches you tricks like using a lasso – which you can later use on criminals for bigger bounties – while the sheriff of Armadillo takes you on raiding missions that give you access to better guns than your shitty default Cattleman Revolver. At the beginning of the game you are SUPPOSED to suck. The further you get in the game, the better it gets; your guns, your aim, everything improves. L.A. Noire is also very similar… while there are 5 desks in the game, the first desk is there to teach you the ropes.
So time to stop worrying and go pick up that shiny new console you’ve been wanting. I personally think that some of the stories I’ve seen in video games over the past year are more riveting than those I’ve been watching on TV and in theaters. I highly suggest picking up Portal 2, which will have you tumbling down the most awesome rabbit hole you’ve never seen.
With all that said, there are always exceptions. If you’re more interested in playing fighting games, you’re going to have to either learn some serious combos or click every button as fast as you can. Ahh… the more things change, the more they stay the same. ;)
Dial M for Mature
Last weekend Rockstar Games invited me to a private demo of L.A. Noire at the historic Roosevelt Hotel in Hollywood. As a girl who went 100% on Red Dead Redemption last year, I’ve been seriously looking forward to this game, so there was no way in hell I was going to pass up a private demo!
Since my mother was in town, and I never meet strangers without bringing someone along, I brought her to the demo. We were led to a swanky room with haunting jazz playing, and the words “L.A. Noire” lighting up a big screen TV. After a briefing on the technology and basic information on the game, Tim – the guy showing me the demo – clicked Start. A moment later he paused dramatically to warn us that the video game is rated M. I turned to my mom and whispered “M is for Mature” then sat back to watch the show thinking the worst I’d see is what I’d already seen in previous Rockstar Games titles Red Dead Redemption and the Grand Theft Auto series. Holy shit, was I wrong.
Tim loaded up “The Red Lipstick Murder” and it showed graphic violence of a mysterious man pulling a woman out of a car trunk by her hair, then beating her over the head with some kind of metal object as she screamed and blood spurted from offscreen. It was chilling, but that wasn’t all. After a homicide briefing the next day, Detective Cole Phelps went to investigate the scene of the crime… and lying on the grass was a full-frontal naked female corpse with a hairy private area and the chilling initials “B.D.” (see Black Dahlia) written in red lipstick on her torso.
At this point I felt extremely uncomfortable. I was in a dark room, sitting next to my mother, watching a detailed naked, mutilated female corpse being thoroughly examined on the TV. This certainly wasn’t Pac-Man.
The rest of the demo was great. I got to see how realistic the technology used to capture the actors’ faces really was, and also heard how guns in this game, as they are in the real lives of police officers, are a last resort. It was refreshing, and made the game feel truly mature.
That said, this is a game made for adults. Though Red Dead Redemption was also rated M for Mature, I was consistently running into bratty kids playing it in multiplayer on XBox Live. Red Dead Redemption and the GTA series appeal to adolescent boys because it satisfies their aggressive teen fantasies with murder and crime, but L.A. Noire is a gentleman’s game of intelligence, skill, and patience. While I’m still uncomfortable with the extreme nudity and the idea that someone may eventually hack the game to make a rather disgusting necrophilia scene (see Hot Coffee mod), I’m happy to see how Rockstar Games is growing up with its’ players.
L.A. Noire hits stores on Tuesday, May 17th, and is available online for pre-order. Thanks to Mike and Tim from Rockstar Games for the awesome demo and the fancy water! ;)
Red Dead McKinnon
Thanks to artist Len Peralta, known for his awesome work on Geek a Week, for doing this. You’ve made me a very happy nerd! Be sure to check out more of his work on his Flickr account, including his awesome set for Geek a Week. Also, check out this drawing he made of Veronica Belmont a few years ago wearing a Galacticast t-shirt!!!
Special thanks to my buddy Fee501st for suggesting this to Len on Twitter! <3
Red Dead Obsession
Today is a red-letter day. [Pun intended]. I’m so happy to announce that I’ve attained 100% in Red Dead Redemption. Thanks to the dozens of awesome people who’ve congratulated me on Twitter and Facebook, you make me so proud :*)
I’ve never completed a video game so thoroughly in my LIFE! I finished some Atari 2600 games (Pitfall 2, Adventure, etc), some GameBoy games (Super Mario Land, Maru’s Mission, etc.), but most FPS (and 3PS) games I’ve watched as a spectator (and coach) as my boyfriend Rudy plays through and completes them. Though I loved playing Half-Life 2, Portal, Left 4 Dead 1 & 2, and Shadow of the Colossus (PS2), I had a really different experience with RDR. By the time I bought RDR, I was OBSESSED with my Gamerscore. It was that obsession that drove me to go above and beyond just completing the story part of the game.
Looking back, I’m so happy I took the time to do it… if only for the look of fear on my boyfriend’s face as I delivered headshot after headshot in my final challenge before attaining 100% (defeating all US gang hideouts in a 24 hour period). Priceless.
Though I feel like I’ve had closure by completing 100% of the game, there is still a lot left to do: more achievements; more DLCs, and; lots of multiplayer and social club challenges. I believe my next step is clear… who wants to join my posse?
Disclaimer: Serious gamers only… I don’t want to talk, I just wanna kill.
